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By engaging in the direct, facilitated communication of joint mediation sessions, parties in divorce and other negotiations save time and money, avoiding delays and misunderstandings.

Electronic Messaging Saves You Time

We use email, voicemail and text messages to send our messages promptly and when convenient for the sender, without having to wait for the other party to connect with us. However, negotiation expert Victoria H. Medvec, PhD, in her 2021 book Negotiate Without Fear, says it’s better to speak directly to the party with whom you are negotiating, in person or on Zoom®.

Only by speaking directly to someone are you aware of their reaction to your message

Dr. Medvec points out that the sender loses the awareness of the receiver’s reaction that the sender gets in the direct connections of phone and Zoom®, so senders should limit their use of electronic communication to messages where understanding the receiver’s reaction is not important. Sadly, electronic communication is indiscriminately and overly used, including by lawyers during negotiations.

Only direct communication avoids misunderstandings and delayed response

In using indirect communication, called asynchronous communication, the sender gives up knowledge of the receiver’s reaction and allows the receiver to delay responding. Thus, we have both more miscommunication and more delay. Direct communication allows the receiver to ask for better understanding of the sender’s message and intent. It provides opportunities for better understanding of each other’s positions, needs and interests and often results in a direct response from the receiver that moves the parties more closely toward settlement.

Use mediation for direct communication

By engaging in the direct, synchronous, facilitated communication of joint mediation sessions, divorcing parties save time and money.  This avoids the miscommunication risks, time delays and needless additional costs incurred when allowing lawyers to take over the communication and negotiations.

Stay in control of you case by engaging in mediation for a facilitated direct communication. Use your lawyer for legal advice between mediation sessions. Don’t turn control over to your lawyer.

The foregoing provides educational information and does not provide legal advice. It was not prepared for you either generally or in connection with any specific issue or case. The mediator does not give legal advice. You are responsible for obtaining legal advice from your own lawyer.